Do you remember the kid magazine, Highlights? Or the lite version, High Five? You'd see them in doctors' offices usually unless you had a subscription. And if you do remember them, you'll recall that there's a parent/child kitchen activity in every one (be sure to collect them all). Every so often, Kiddo receives one in the mail courtesy of a relative's continuous and annually renewing generosity. We used to read them with her, but she's gotten so stellar at reading on her own over the past year that I'd forgotten about the kitchen activities. That is...until the other day.
Non-interesting story less boring, and what's more, to the point: Kiddo and I made the Cheesy Spinach Treats tonight from the Highlights magazine. Why not? Kiddo will occasionally eat baby spinach leaves and sometimes cheese and eggs. I was thinking positively about the endeavor. Because, you know, get kids to cook with you in the kitchen and they'll want to eat what they make, right? Sure. I had her read the recipe and tell me what to do too! She liked that a lot.
So here's what you need if you want to make Cheesy Spinach Treats:
Vegetable oil spray
4 cups baby spinach
Olive oil
2 eggs
1 cup sour cream
Salt
Pepper
Cheese
Heat your oven to 350. None of that preheat shit. It's either heating or not heating, there is no other state of being for an oven. Tear 4 cups of baby spinach into small pieces.
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| or use a pizza cutter. Easy peasy, lemon squeezy. |
Heat 1 tablespoon of olive oil in a skillet and saute the spinach for about 4 minutes (until wilted). Remove from heat and cool.
Whisk 2 eggs until the yolks and whites are mixed. Add 2 cups of sour cream, 1/2 teaspoon of salt and 1/4 teaspoon of pepper. Stir well.
Add the cooked spinach and 1 cup of your favorite grated cheese.
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| Looks like Charleston's Spinach Dip, yum! |
Fill 12 muffin cups with the mixture. Top with grated cheese.
Bake on the middle shelf of the oven for 25 minutes. Wait 5 minutes before removing the spinach treat from the muffin tray. Serve warm or at room temperature.
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| Little quiches! |
And the verdict?
Shitty. Absolutely shitty. Where the fuck does Highlights get off calling these pieces of snot, "treats"? Kiddo took one look at them and was all "nope nope nope nope nope". Mommy was not as clever. The smell and taste of these fuckers transported Mommy back to her 2nd grade elementary cafeteria in the OKC School District and remembering not being allowed to go out and play with all the other kids since she didn't eat her cooked spinach slop. Mommy still has evil thoughts about that mustachioed woman.
I just don't know what went wrong! There was a lot of steam that escaped when I opened the oven door and quite a bit of liquid at the bottom of each muffin tincup when I took out the shit. So, no...don't make these... unless you can make it better than this. Or unless you like that shitty flavor. Then, you should and you should also gloat to me about it. I hate you preemptively and curse your mustache.






Sorry - too many typos.
ReplyDeleteOh how disappointing. For me, that is. Here I am thinking "Ooh, this will be a great lunch snack".
I made something similar which was actually tasty, but you just roll them into little balls and bake them on a baking tray or cookie sheet. Perhaps that might make them bake without leaving a pool of liquid. They were actually quite tasty too, but quite time-consuming as I remember.
Truly a disappointment. 4 cups of spinach is no joke, time-wise.
DeleteOh no, after going to all that trouble, and it sounds like it should work. Sort of.
ReplyDeleteMaybe one egg instead of two. Would you have made this?
DeleteDisappointing? Yet. But it made for a hilarious post. I always liked the "how are these pictures different?" part of Highlights. Ah, memories....
ReplyDelete"which one of these things is not like the other? which one of these just doesn't belong?"
DeleteI like the hidden pictures.
Well, they look great! Thanks for the funny break from the usual, "Hey, look at the recipe for this pretty, delicious thing you'll never get off your butt to make!" I spend a lot of time on Pinterest not making the things I see :)
ReplyDeleteYeah, I'm not a fan of pinterest or the pinterheads' telling me what they pinnypin-pinned. Gets old.
DeleteThey did look nice, like a Monet...great from afar, crap close up.
Many many years ago (back when I had just one child to contend with)I made something similar- taken from a recipe out of a parenting magazine. But you put that goopy mess in a cake pan and then cut it with cookie cutters (they recommended dinosaurs). The fun shapes were supposed to entice 'your picky eater' to eat something healthy. They, too, tasted shitty and my kid took one look at them and told me he would puke if I made him try them. So I don't think you did anything wrong- our ingredients were the same.
ReplyDeleteWhy is it that the young are smarter than us?
Deletehttp://www.bloomberg.com/news/2012-08-20/obama-crashes-wife-s-state-dinner-for-children-recipes.html
ReplyDeleteHi, Grandma Sandy says you can't go wrong with anything chocolate. Although, Aunt Megan started with fruit kabobs when she was little. She accidentally lightly stabbed her best friend in the head with the bamboo stick. So, you have to be careful not to get your head between Aunt Megan and her bamboo stick. Just a family cooking tip that involved blood and a band-aid. Any day is a good day when you don't need the ER. Smile!
This would be the origin of why Meg isn't the primary chef in that house.
DeleteWell, the thought of making something with Kiddo was fun. But I literally laughed out loud reading this!
ReplyDeleteI'm so glad. My pain, your gain. God, I wish I had a better cliche than that.
DeleteThe use of the word 'treat' is somewhat misplaced.
ReplyDeleteIf this was Hallowe'en, I'd've thrown those "tricks" at my pervy old neighborman.
DeleteOh shit, this made me laugh out loud. I love this post!!
ReplyDeletethank you so much Kari! I'm glad you did.
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