I guess it'd be to make room for the cupcakes... and upcoming Thanksgiving Dinner prep and leftovers.
We took Kiddo to Krazy Kingdom for a classmate's 4th birthday. If this birthday party is any indication of British birthday traditions then, for the kids, it's awesome. For parents like us, it's crap. I think we each had the unspoken goal of getting to meet and talk to parents.
Kiddo had a blast! And we enjoyed watching her have a fantastic little-girl-running-amok time. There were trampolines (which she made a beeline for) and a three story climbing structure not unlike the one from the PlayPit.... it was just huge! There was a posted policy saying you can't take pictures or videos of children in the play area, which was the entire warehouse-sized space. But I took one anyways. It's my kid, I can do what I want.
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| Kiddo is in the pink jacket and purple trousers. You can't even tell who the other kids are. Take that, massively invasive public policy! I pwnd you! |
Then a gal came on over the PA system and announced that it was time to have the party and would all attendees for that party please make way to the room at the stairs. We make our way there and before I get into the details, let me talk about what happened between me and another parent.
We're all milling about around this small area and some parents stay downstairs, others go up the stairs... for the same party. I overhear someone say "well, which one is it?" I look around quizzically, and I kid you not, I catch a parent's eye and she says, "Normally, we queue." This means, "Normally, we line up and wait for someone to tell us what to do." I sigh, and decide to remove Kiddo and myself from this state of limbo. We go upstairs, just to look around and saw.... a GO-KART TRACK! AND TWO BOWLING LANES! Really neat! We make one circuit around and sure enough, by the time we come down the other set of stairs, the birthday party queue is sorted and everyone knows what is expected of them. It was kind of fun to watch. *cough*
In the room, which was about the size of our current living room, they crammed 20 kids under the age of seven into two long kid-sized picnic tables and served them lunch. The accompanying parents jostled each other for wall space. Eventually I channeled my mom and had to get out of there...it was claustrophobia inducing. That many people in that small of a space is not something I would do if it were up to me.
And where's ScienceMan while we're doing this? Eating a hamburger. To be fair, his food came out first so it was no problem for me. He finished and then I got to eat this surprisingly good (and large!) pizza which I had to take home. ScienceMan was smarter than me; he stayed in the doorway where he could see Kiddo and help her if he needed to.
Okay, so after the other kiddos ate, they passed out small styrofoam tubs of vanilla ice cream, which Kiddo demolished. Quite right. Her lunch looked like laskdjfslfdjkks. And then there's the cake. It was the size of my laptop. Who gets cake? The kids.
Who doesn't get cake? Me.
But it wasn't good cake either. They do cheese and butter and yogurt really well here, but when it comes to pastry that isn't cheese, onion, and meat-stuffed, they're crap.
So, 4 candles are lit and blown out. Everybody sings 'Happy Birthday' and shouts 'Hip hip hooray' four times after. The cake is taken away (I'm really upset about the cake, I now realize) and everyone is ushered back out into the play area. Meanwhile, the cake is cut into several pieces and each piece is individually wrapped and put into the goodie bags which are handed out after everyone gets ushered back into the room. Yes, there was another announcement on the PA system. At some point, I'm eating my pizza, and I see Krazy Kingdom's mascot, a red dragon, walk into the room. Every British child in the room, and those outside in the play area not attending the party, goes nuts. My kid reacted like you think ScienceMan would react. I reacted like you think I would react: furtive glances around the room (i'm outside the party room at a table eating) looking for the destructive children who run up to mascot/characters and kick them and then take off running. I had a bad experience at a Cavs game. I'm really enjoying my pizza though.
But I kept thinking, "soon we'll get some cake."
Eventually (2pm), it's time to go home, without cake. I finally figured out who the birthday girl's mom was and introduced myself and said thank you even though she never allowed me cake. Received a goody bag on behalf of Kiddo. Drove homewards through some heartwrenching English countryside views that ScienceMan got to enjoy and I saw only peripherally (was driving, so am responsible, Sensible Lady). Sheep with black faces and with white faces. Horses. Gigantic windmills. Hills and valleys. Cloudy and shafts of sunlight. Fall foliage. Arrived at home and opened goody bag with Kiddo, confiscated cake. Took one bite. Had to meet my kid's gaze afterwards. Resolved to never raid my child's party bag ever again.
Summary: Kiddo had a great time. ScienceMan and I ate lunch and watched our kid have a great time.
Stats: New friends: 0.
Increased personal knowledge of the island's geographical range: yes
Increased personal knowledge of personal behavioral tendencies to be selfish: yes
Result: Successful day.
